This post is a complete rip off from Gear Patrol’s essay titled, The Best Shave I Ever Had. I’m a big fan of their site and as I read this essay, it got me thinking about the wet shaves I’ve had in Palermo, Capri, Kusadasi, Indianapolis, Goa, and Mumbai. So this is my experience sitting in the chair, with a tip of the hat to Jeremy Berger at Gear Patrol.

I take shaving very seriously. Why? Because I hate having to do it. So, when I do have to, I make sure it’s done well. At home, I use Harry’s shaving products. It’s the best stuff I’ve found and gives me the cleanest, closest shave. Anything I can do to delay this activity helps.

Harry's Gift SetWhen traveling I tend to shave less (unless it is work related). Abroad, I like to let the stubble settle in, and then I head to an old school barber shop. It’s always a man, with a no no nonsense approach and enough years at the chair to deal with any face shape or size.

The wet shaves I had in Capri and Indianapolis were terrible. There were patches of hair still left. I basically went home and shaved again.

But the one I had in Mumbai was unforgettable and superb.

It started with several rounds of lathering. Then a double wet shave. This man had an eye for detail and I knew I’d be leaving with a superior shave. After the double shave, I was lathered again with a variety of creams, ointments and concoctions. I got the feeling that some of these were homemade, some of them very old, and some of them now possibly banned in other countries. But sitting in that chair, what are you doing to do? I looked for an allergic reaction or rash, but all was clear.

After this hydration approach, I was given a face massage by hand. Which felt great. Then my barber strapped what looked like a palm sander to the back of his hand, plugged it in and then he palmed my face. This palm sander, muscle car carburetor or whatever it was, caused an incredibly intense, probing vibration to my cranium, sinuses, nasal passage and eye sockets. At one point, I thought my nose would break. But, as mentioned in the previous paragraph, you’re in the chair. This massage was more akin to torture than therapy. I was so pleased when it ended.

But the massages continued.

This time to the my head. Fortunately this did not involve any gadgets. Instead, it consisted of him feverishly scratching my scalp with his finger nails. It was like watching a cat with fleas. And my head burned. My barber was also not too impressed with my bouffon, barnet or hair style. The massage also included a makeover. And he immediately dispensed some new products into my hair, wielding a comb, something my head only sees at a salon back home. He worked his magic and made me look like an Ivy League prep boy. Which was fine.

Was I done? No. One last act to this marvelous play. Clean shaven, sculpted hair? There was only one thing missing. A splash of Old Spice.

The smells from childhood overwhelmed me, but the sting of Old Spice brought me back to reality. I paid and tipped my barber (something like $5 total) and headed back into the frenetic streets of Mumbai. With the best shave of my life. See for yourself.

Before and after - the shave

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3 Responses
  1. Re: Program/programme. My eyes must have deceived me! Coulda sworn I read in this article 'program' which in the context should have been 'programme'. Apologies – couldn't find it anywhere. Duh! Great article though – though wish all those whites would start to defend their country by kicking the traitors that run it into touch!

  2. please please PLEASE for the love of god, sort things out with WMG, i mean legitimately sort things out. to this date i still can't upload anything with WMG-owned music in it, and my old videos with WMG music can't be made public still. i thought your "agreement" was suppose to fix this…

  3. Hahaha. Steve… Another member sent me that link yesterday. We are working on a program to develop that phenomenon. I’m considering which trainer to make lead on it and I think Mr. Hot-Deliciousness will be the choice.On the other stuff… no need to compare or contrast our program with CF Coastal’s. Anyone who is reading this blog, and therefore your comments, already knows the difference.

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