My mother-in-law and I are hosting a small football party today. This is Indianapolis. It loves football and I love cooking and food, so a perfect activity for Sunday.

I’ m not really doing any of the cooking – Nancy is, and she’s an amazing chef and very kind to run with this idea today. Especially since she’s doing all of the work as I type.

So here’s what’s on the menu today. My friend George Greco always said, “It’s not tipping I believe in, it’s over tipping.” We’ve employed a similar approach to the menu. Overthetop.

Texas Sausage Balls – “Texan woman moves to New Jersey to hit the big time.”

• 1lb Jimmy Dean Sausage HOT
• 1.5 cups of Bisquick
• 2 cups of finely shredded mild cheddar
• Make ‘em into balls, about the size of a walnut
• Bake at 325 for 20 minutes, deep in the heart of Texas. Don’t mess with it.

Nancy’s Sweet & Tangy Potato Salad – “The key is miracle whip!”

• 6-7 Russet Potatoes – peel and par-boil, chunk it
• 5-6 chopped celery stalks
• 5-6 chopped carrots
• 1 medium onion – slice and dice people
• 12oz of miracle whip
• 3 tablespoons of sweet relish
• 4 hard boiled eggs (3 in it, 1 for garnish)
• 4lbs of paprika (or a couple of dashes)
• Mix it all together with love.

Nancy’s Nacho Layers of Love – “Some like it hot.”

• 2 bags of large tortilla chips (none of that lime crap)
• Chopped and sauteed onion
• Can ‘o green chiles
• Yellow or Red bell pepper, chopped and sauteed with onion and chiles
• 6 Jalepenos (throw ‘em in the sauteed mess)
• Some chipoltes – throw ‘em in
• Can of drained black beans
• Add chile powder, salt & pepper cumin.
• Layer all of this crap on chips. Add cheese. Add More chips. Repeat.  It’s a layered nacho experience. Unforgettable.

Corporate Toll House Derby Pie – “It tastes good, despite it’s corporate origins – and because of that, no photo.”

• 2 eggs
• 1/2 cup of flour
• 1/2 cup of sugar
• 1/2 cup of brown sugar
• 3/4 cup softened butta
• One 6oz package of Nestle semi-sweet morsels (it HAS TO BE Nestle or you will get sued)
• 1 9-inch unbaked pie shell.
• Mix it all together, blah blah blah. Add to pie crust. Zap it at 325 for about an hour. Cool before cutting. Or else.

Big Bubba’s Brisket Bunz – “A modified Paula Deen recipe”

Since I provided a link to the recipe, I’m not going to list everything. I will say this. The dry rub is one of the most under-appreciated parts of cooking meat. I’m not kidding. So we’re going with a char crust rub – including salt ‘n peppa, sugar, chiles, mustard and so on. Plus some top secret sh*t I’m not divulging that may or may not involve coca cola.

Instead of serving this formally, we’re going with brisket sandwiches to mix and play with potato salad and chips and beer and so on. It’s for sitting on the couch holding a beer and shouting at the TV. The toppings offer guests the opportunity for creative consumption – going with a cole slaw or horse radish perhaps?

We cooked 3.25 lbs of brisket – emphasizing the natural meat flavor…and you guessed it, da rub!

So there you have it.  Sorry you didn’t get the evite. It was delicious! And thank you Nancy!